Support groups and supportive couples work

It’s happened again and again. A client reaches a new understanding of her mental health status, and then asks for resources for her family members. The lifestyle changes required when someone realizes that they are, for example, addicted to alcohol (or suffer from bipolar mood swings or have been living with depression for many years) always have an impact on loved ones. Suddenly the client doesn’t want to go along with old patterns of behavior. She may need to eat out less, to support a new weight loss initiative. Or he may require strict rules about sleep and quiet time, to maintain functionality with AD/HD.

Finding the support and assistance to help explain these long-term changes to others can be a challenge. I learned first-hand about this struggle when trying to find a support group for a depressed client’s spouse a few years ago. Coming up empty by calling hospitals, counseling centers, and schools in the DC area, I realized there was lots to learn about this part of the therapeutic process. I did some deeper research earlier this year, resulting in an article in the March issue of  Counseling Today.

What I didn't write about was the value that couples work can provide when helping one person fully accept and understand the struggle of another. Frequently, one spouse enters therapy with the expectation that the sessions will be used to reveal the dysfunctionality of the other spouse. Any Imago therapist will tell you, what we find in one person, is often mirrored, in some way, by the other. When one member of a couple knows what s/he struggles with, it's often a great roadmap to the heart of what the other member finds challenging. Support groups are an invaluable resource, but bringing these issues into couples therapy is another way to deepen connection.